Friday, August 8, 2008

Can I Have A Woe Is Me Moment?

My goodness, once again it's Friday. My husband is beyond consumed with his job right now, he's drowning in mind reeling things to do. Things to do at work. Because the long hours aren't quite enough, work also has to consume him mentally when he's finally home for the night.

I guess all of my neighbor's trash cans out on the curb did not set off a hint to my husband to put the trash out this morning. I sent the note Sj created to my parents in a package, so I guess it's time for a new one. I wonder if anyone caught a glimpse of me this morning, scurrying to put the trash out in my husband's flip flops, my pajamas, and no bra. I swear the way I looked was blog fodder. Poor housewife, stay at home mom, let herself go. If they could only see beyond the walls and how guilt ridden I feel for not having washed the floors in two weeks or how the pile of mail is growing. Oh the list could go on.

My hubby's workload has obviously impacted our household. I feel like things are out of balance and there's nothing really for me to do, other than suck it up. My husband is going to hate me for this, but I feel like I am living the life of a single mother, with no family in town to help out. It's during these times that I always regret moving away from family. Moving away from those that would come take my kids for a couple of hours, so I could breathe. Breathe deep breaths, go for a run, scour a sink with out someone tugging on my leg, maybe even cook me a meal, or put away the laundry before someone thinks it's fun to unfold all of it.

I dream of saying, "Have fun at Nana and Papa's see you in the morning!"

Granted my husband isn't out having a fun time, he's working and stressing out. Does that make me feel better about the situation? Sometimes, but mainly no. I want the balance to be back for all of us. Patience is a virtue that is slipping away from me. Soon enough we'll be on the flip side of Labor Day and my life with my husband will return to the something we could consider to be normal.



  1. I know how you feel. My husband has to travel for work a lot. That leave me with 3 kids under the age of 3 and no local family to help. Like you I often fantasize about dropping the kids off at their grandparents house for the day...

    I just think it's funny when Chris is left to deal with the kids on his own and he thinks that I should be planning a big party in his honor the following day. Oh well - at least he helps when he's here!

  2. I could have written this post. I asked my husband last night if it was us or work b/c something is off and I'm just getting pounded...youngest turns four next week (gulp!) and oldest starts school. I'm not ready for the back to school craziness...

    my family is somewhat near, but with gas prices we don't see them much....and that, too, presents it's own set of challenges. family help is great when they listen, but we often have to detox. and they always come home with a ton of crap.

    oh yeah...I took the trash out at midnight last night :)

  3. I could have written this post, as well. I envy my sister-in-law several hours away, who can drive around the corner to deposit her kids at Grandma's house while she works out, catches a movie, goes shopping...

    I know that I made all of the choices that have given me the life I have, but sometimes it's more than I can take. What we can take comfort in is the fact that we can be full service mommies under the most trying of curcumstances (because what choice do we have?) Kind of like Boot Camp for Mommies. Hang in there :)

  4. i know you about as well as anyone, i think you are frustrated about the c.o.b. and you need a punching bag to unleash on,its called spallane fury!

  5. I know how it is not to have family around to help. We experience that every time we move as well as trying to make new friends. If I were still there I would take the girls for you. If anyone does offer, definitely take them up on it and don't feel guilty! Perhaps when things get back to normal, you can have a regular routine of taking some time for yourself at least once a week. I do this and my favorite by myself moment has been eating lunch - ALONE. It's GREAT! You should give it a try too :)

  6. My husband doesn't travel too much, but when he does I feel overwhelmed and can't imagine how a single parent does it.
    We don't live very close to family, either and sometimes it gets hard.
    Hope things get easier for you soon!

  7. That is why I am forever greatful to have both sets of parents here. I don't abuse it but I do take full advantage.

    Just think, Labor Day is not too far away. You can get through this.

  8. I am right there with you. My family is 2000 miles away and my husband is in real estate so he is gone for pretty much the entire summer :(
    Just think Labor Day is less than a month away.

  9. Man can I ever relate how you feel right now. I told my hubby last night I was ready to quit his job for him - working 12-14 hour days, driving 2 hours out of state to get to clients (before he was working all local, now his company changed contracts...)

    I think a woe is me moment is necessary once in awhile, it helps to vent things out :)

    I think like you after labor day things will start to get back to normal, my son will be starting school, and so i'm pretty optimistic about it!

  10. Labor day will be here soon! Just hang in there, hon.

  11. Terry doesn't travel, thank God, but he's been working late a lot. It really throws everyone off. Hang in there!

  12. Hang in there girl. You have the right to have days like this. Thinking of ya...

  13. We go through this too every spring and it's so tough. No family nearby either. I wish I had a good answer for you, but if I did, I'd have an easier time of it every year. ; ) The best I can tell ya is take care of yourself and get with your girlfriends as often as you can.
    That said, glad you could come last night! :)

  14. Since I read this post following your other one, I know things have improved ... But I still wanted to say, I hear ya. Things getting out of balance, for whatever reason, always sucks. Glad they are getting slowly back - and your family is coming soon!

  15. I have a similiar situation. My husband leaves the house at 6 am and gets home aruond 8. (Poor him!)

    I'm home with the kids all day. He is so tired that I take out the trash, do all the laundry, basically all the domestic stuff.

    Unfortunately I don't always do it up to his standards, which are pretty high.

    Get over it buddy.


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