Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Tomorrow is THE Day, 3 Weeks Later...

On September 30, I felt like I had hit rock bottom. Emotionally I was drained, my house was beyond a wreck. Dishes, laundry, toys, shoes, mail, artwork were better known as piles upon piles. All those items have a home, but there was no follow through from anyone in my household to get those items in their appropriate place. For me, how my home is kept is a direct correlation to how I feel and boy was I in a slump. 

I wrote this post about changing my ways starting October 1st. 

Over the course of the past three weeks, I have changed my ways. Dishes are done after meals, counters are wiped. Toys are in their cute baskets or bins. I've rearranged the living room furniture, which always makes me feel accomplished. Laundry is put away. Coats, bags, and shoes are stowed away in the entryway closet when we return home, not just dumped in the middle of the floor. Hello, we are so lucky to have an entry way closet! But there is still work to do. My office/playroom is still a disaster, but 85% of the house is beyond fabulous. 

One of the things that helped me change my ways was a conversation with one of my oldest friends. She runs a tight ship and so I said give me the low down,  I want your household secrets. Silly as it may sound, I came right out and said, I need to know how you put laundry away, when it's folded. No really, how do you do it? In my house it sits in a basket and gets rummaged through and then it makes a mess. Then I get all resentful and in turn I loathe laundry duty. Grumble, grumble. 

She simply responded, "You have to want to do it. You just have to convince yourself it's what you want". 

You know what, she was absolutely 100% right. Really that was all it took. Those words. I convinced myself it's what I want. Doing laundry means, sorting piles, washing, drying, folding, and putting away. Straightening up drawers and sorting out clothes that need to be mended or that the girls have outgrown, every week. I even, put away my husband's clothes. Typically I would let him fend for himself in the laundry department. 

With those words I also convinced myself of something else. Quite often, even though I dreaded the mess in my house, I would just leave it because I wanted my husband to pitch in and help. I was trying to punish him by leaving the chaos everywhere, but in reality I was punishing myself. My home is also my office, I spend my days here with the girls and I just simply convinced myself it's my job to keep my office running smoothly, clean, and organized. I don't know what J would say about the past three weeks, but I'm not on his back about housework. I'm making the effort on my own and I've taken on the responsibility as part of my job. I decided that when he does pitch in (with out my nagging) that it's a bonus, maybe one less load of dishes or one load of laundry I don't have to do. Truthfully, he's been following through with hanging up his jacket or emptying the dishwasher in the morning. 

Kind of wild around here, huh?

Really, it's still a work in progress. My house is by no means immaculate. But the effort is moving forward, instilling a sense of pride in me. My goal is to have the entire house in shape by the end of the month, which means on top of all laundry even cabinets and closets revamped, so I can start the Fly Lady routine come November 1. There is no reason why I can't start now, but I feel like I want to be established when I introduce the routine. 

Once again, my progress is to be continued...

17 comments:

  1. Good for you!

    I've had those episodes in my life where I just wanted help so badly or was so sick of it that I just let it all go. I had a friend tell me that she tells herself, "If this was your job you'd be fired."

    It worked for me. It is my job. I get to stay home, so I should treat it that way.

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  2. You're much more ambitious than I am - my goal is to be organized, completely, totally, by the end of the year. We've gotten the living/dining/family room fairly organized now after installing hardwoods, but my office and all the bedrooms need to be rid of extra stuff we don't need/use.

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  3. That's so great! Good for you. I think it also takes lots of discipline and focus. I love your friend's advice too- Melissa

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  4. Good job - keep it up! Don't you find you're so much happier working and living a clean and picked up home? I let things go, too, and then I'll get into the mood to tidy up and put things away and this will last for a while and I'm trying to make it something I do all the time! The one thing I do always always always: clean up the kitchen. I have never left a plate in the sink before going to bed. And I will always pick up the family room, where the children play during the day, for the most part - I'll put everything away and set out new toys on rotation so when they wake up they have new things to play with!

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  5. Wow, this sounds great!!! I like the advice...you have to want to do it. How splendidly simple...even though I'm sure it will be hard at times. I'm looking forward to applying this in my own life. Thanks, and good luck! Sounds like you're on a roll!

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  6. I have GOT to try this!

    For almost two weeks after my inlaws came to town, I kept the house almost as clean as it was (nearly spotless) while they were here. Then, somehow it all went to shit.

    But I am going to try this. Because I was never happier or more satisfied at home when it was clean.

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  7. wow -good for you! I am definitely happier and in a better mood when my house is organized (which isn't as often as I'd like, unfortunately ;))

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  8. Good for you for all of your diligence! xoxo keri

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  9. You are 100% right. I put all of our laundry away be I want to. That is why I put my hubby's stuff away too. Otherwise he never would and it would sit out until forever. He wouldn't be bothered, but I would. So I do it. The end. Now no one is bothered.
    Good for you for taking such initiative. :)

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  10. Good for you, keep up the good work.

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  11. Awesome work and advice! I try, really really try, but I can't always keep up. I'll get there someday. I'm a work in progress. :) I love FlyLady. I would be lost without my daily routines. I can't do any of the other FlyLady stuff right now with my crazy schedule, but I always do my routines. Well, almost always. I posted them on my cupboard and my husband actually looks at them and does chores off them at night. He thinks they're the worlds best idea because he can help and I don't have to ask/nag. They have really become "our" routines rather than "my" routines.

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  12. I knew you could do it!! Now remember there will be set-ups (illness, surprises) and they will be very easy to overcome--it's all attitude :)

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  13. I agree completely.

    We're moving next week and I'm hoping for a new start in the new house (and the extra pair of hands that comes with it)

    I can't wait to try it out and I hope it sticks.
    I'm tired of feeling so unmotivated to keep things in their place.

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  14. You are awesome, it's hard to turn that kind of thing around. I hold out for help sometimes too, but I feel so much better when I just get it done.

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  15. Sometimes all it takes is a simple statement like that. I'm with you--the condition of my house is in correlation with how I feel. I'm not the immaculate type but I definitely need some semblance of order and cleanliness!

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  16. If there's one thing that gets me down, it's Mount Laundry. Something about the unfolded, clean laundry can really send me over the edge. I'll have to try this, just want to do it trick.

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  17. Great for you! You really do feel so much better when the house is in order, and yes, I agree that how your house looks often reflects how you feel. You should see the mess around here :)

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I always appreciate the gesture to stop and take a moment to comment. Thank you!