On Throwing Away My Sketchbook

* Preface, oh hello. One day a very long time ago, you subscribed to my blog. If you care to no longer receive these verbose attempts at unimportant tales of my life, please hit the unsubscribe button below. I'm assuming there's one of those, it would be really shitty if there wasn't one, Blogger.  Last week, a pile that was festering beside my bedside nightstand finally grabbed my attention. The pile was my lovely turquoise art bin overflowing with tangled embroidery thread, various art supplies which escaped from their respective sets, and a stack of articles I printed out. Yes, I enjoy reading papers especially in bed, instead of being attached to my digital device 24x7. This art bin always needs a bit of a wrestle to close, so as one may assume, I hardly ever close both latches. I pretty much set myself up for this vicious cycle of disorganization when it concerns my art supply bin, but it feels like the ultimate embodiment of an artist. Messy, disorganized, and frustr

Self Isolation: Day 63 Why The Hell Not

My blog appears as the landing page when I open my internet browser. I usually just begin typing away and don't even give my blog a second glance, but today I paused. I haven't written since September 2019, a brief moment of eagerness and potential to reboot this space. I made it six posts before abandoning my enthusiasm. We are currently 63 days deep into our self isolation and safer at home phase of the Covid-19 Pandemic. 63 days and here I sit thinking, maybe I should throw up a blog post.  The places we have arrived in just two short months were completely unfathomable to me. Like, if you told me I'd walk into CorePower Yoga on a Thursday night (March 12 to be exact) to teach my regular class and walk out learning school had been shut down, then within days the yoga studio would close down completely, I would've said there's simply no way. Well the reality is, there is the possibility and we are living it. I've spent the past two months essentially she

therapy sketch

leather couch throw rugs chairs have moved art is the same tea mug sitting on a mini trunk body scan head to toe parts my mind doesn't recognize the worst part is realizing my brain doesn't want to see parts of my own body trauma revealed.

Clearing Out The Hotspots

My nightstand is a hotspot, which is currently hotter than hell. Miscellaneous things gather on my nightstand. When I glance over I see nasal spray, pillow spray, a coffee mug (currently in use), an empty water glass, a vintage blue glass soap dish full of special stones, shells, and a pin from a Coldplay concert. There is a small ceramic tray with lip balm, a photo card, a hair tie, and a Himalayan salt heart. I see miscellaneous papers like grocery store receipts and tags cut from clothes, a little baggie with a button. Body butter, a pen, a travel size toothpaste, and a small notebook for random thoughts. There are items to be discarded, which I haven't taken the effort to simply pick up and throw away. My brow begins to furrow. The hotspot aka hot mess has flowed into randomness on the floor next to my nightstand. Currently, 4 library books, a couple of issues of Real Simple, two journals, a lip balm, paperwork from my work from home job, and a legal pad. There's a half e

Hall Pass

Lofty aspirations of writing for 100 days in a row and carrying the weight of a cold. This will be my hall pass post. Tomorrow there shall be thoughtful words.

Cold Care Natural Soothing Remedies

A swiftly moving respiratory virus has invaded our home. For the first time in years, I have succumb. It's very strange to be the one wanting to be in bed at 7pm and begging for a cup of tea to be delivered to me. The version I have is mainly sitting in my sinuses, with a nice sprinkle of laryngitis. Over the years we have developed our own family routine for caring for respiratory viruses. I would also like to disclose, we have a family member with asthma and we always follow their doctor prescribed protocol. Because of the asthma diagnosis, we also can't use things like over the counter cough syrup.  We have come up with a huge laundry list of remedies to help us get through the worst parts of a virus which can't be treated with prescriptions. Soothing remedies for respiratory VIRAL symptoms: Gargle with salt and water (long standing generational family remedy) Gargle with apple cider vinegar, for my daughter that can not tolerate salt + water gargle If a bedtime c

The Study of Self

Secretly there's a part of me that wishes the story began, thirty years ago I started seeing a therapist. The reality is three years ago I started seeing a therapist. Yet, I'm not going to undermine how three years feels like a beautiful celebration of the personal work I've done. The study of self has led me to places difficult to face, dark and unwieldy, conversely nuanced with acknowledging the most delicate and light filled spaces within me that were larger than I have ever dreamt.  I could feel a huge momentum in my life, a deep awareness within my simple day to day experiences, alignments that brought me joy. A shift bigger than I was ready to face was taken away from my realm of possibility. Everything was going my way, until it wasn't. Instantaneously I became stuck, less confident in my ability to move forward authentically. Excuses became default comforts, my presence diminished. Now, from the cumulative work of three years, I will not allow a setback to