Showing posts from January, 2018

When Numbing Out With Food Stops Working

My father died in November. I proceeded to numb myself out with food all through the holidays. The abundance of holiday treats at gatherings, work, and in my home didn't make me feel like I was going out of my way to overindulge. It was a continuous nibble on whatever was in front of me, late morning through after dinner. I started adding sugar to my morning coffee because my father never drank coffee without sugar, I was honoring him. When I'd add two tablespoons up from one, it tasted even better. I'd snack on cereal and refill my bowl if milk was remaining. Yes rolled off my tongue when a server asked if we wanted a second bowl of chips when dining out. The unconscious eating stories are endless. After all, it was the holidays and my father died, so naturally I said yes a lot.

Food is comforting. It's okay, I have a lot going on. I shouldn't beat myself up, not now my father died. It's understandable. 
Then I started noticing my pants were snug, buttons popp…